Part of John really didn't want to talk about it. It had, after all, been a long day just as he'd said, and he was still processing what Em had told him. Besides, Bobby knowing and John totally understanding that were two very different things - that same part of him that didn't want to talk was considering all the ways Bobby might have misunderstood, all the differences of substance and style and thought and opinion that opened between them like a chasm, sure in the knowledge that when John said he had fucked up so badly, Bobby probably thought he meant something else.
But he wrenched his mind away from black thoughts, knowing that part would never be satisfied, and took a breath. "I was...buying your Christmas present, and two of the stores I went to - they didn't like the idea I was buying something for my boyfriend." He kept a loose hold on Bobby's hand, but didn't press himself any closer as he spoke. "You know, the usual crap, about not having the right range of stock or that I might want to shop somewhere more appropriate. And I just...I got so angry that it's still fucking like this, you know? That the world's still so full of hate and fear and just...stupid fucking assholes. I could feel sparks in the wall from old, faulty wiring, and as I walked away, I just...held onto one of those sparks and kept it going for just a bit longer, enough to catch." John sighed. "I stopped the fire, both times, a few minutes later. No-one was ever in any danger, but I just wanted...I just could stand these fuckers insulting me to my face. Insulting us. Being bigots. All of the above."
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Date: 2016-02-07 06:38 am (UTC)But he wrenched his mind away from black thoughts, knowing that part would never be satisfied, and took a breath. "I was...buying your Christmas present, and two of the stores I went to - they didn't like the idea I was buying something for my boyfriend." He kept a loose hold on Bobby's hand, but didn't press himself any closer as he spoke. "You know, the usual crap, about not having the right range of stock or that I might want to shop somewhere more appropriate. And I just...I got so angry that it's still fucking like this, you know? That the world's still so full of hate and fear and just...stupid fucking assholes. I could feel sparks in the wall from old, faulty wiring, and as I walked away, I just...held onto one of those sparks and kept it going for just a bit longer, enough to catch." John sighed. "I stopped the fire, both times, a few minutes later. No-one was ever in any danger, but I just wanted...I just could stand these fuckers insulting me to my face. Insulting us. Being bigots. All of the above."